The Divot Diva: BACK IN DALLAS

It's sort of good to be back home, but I'm sure it will only last a day or so, then I'll wish I was back in Vegas with Mel and Sheila again. I have managed to give Stella a bath. Then I started doing pictures, and decided to honor my promise to myself to blog daily. I did try in Vegas, but sometimes the time just didn't work out.

We had a fairly good Friday evening in Vegas. For those of you that know me, I'm a believer in POO POURRI, a spray you use in the bathroom BEFORE you take a dump. It has a nice citris smell, and really works great. It prevents the odors. I always travel with it. I also am smart, so, instead of taking a full bottle of hair spray that is too big to travel on an airplane, I used an eyeglass cleaner bottle to take the right amount of hair spray with me.

We spent the morning by the pool, and then got read to go to the strip. After my shower, I was doing my hair, and noticed the smell of the POO POURRI. For those that don't REALLY know me well, I always trave with it. It's a bathroom deordorizer you use BEFORE taking a dump, and it prevents odors. I figured someone else had used it, which would be a good thing. Then I realized it was getting stronger. YUP.... I had used it instead of the hair spray. To be honest, Sheila sorta thought it was a nice difference from my regular hairspray. I was not in the mood to reshower, so off we went. You know, it did make my hair nice and shiny.

We took a cab to Planet Hollywood, and ate in one of the restaurants at the Mile Shops. Really good dinner. I asked our waiter to take MY picture, and here's what he did.

Then we did take a group picture.

I put this shirt (above) on fresh and clean Friday night, and this is the shirt I wore home on Saturday morning. Do you notice any gold metallic threads? Remember this for later on.

We gambled, surprise surprise, and we ended up at Paris. Sheila and Mel decided the craps table and poker slots were out to bankrupt them, so they headed to Bills. I opted to stay at Paris, cause they had my favorite slots.

I stayed there all evening. I lost money, but had a ball doing it. In Vegas, I don't go to make money, I go to gamble, help their economy, and have fun. I did all three Friday nite, but I did manage to play every type of slot machine they had. Basically, I made money on Gold Fish, and Gems, but lost on all the others. I went home around 2:00, and Sheila was still up. She had been home about an hour, and Mel had come home even earlier than Sheila. They had no luck that night. We packed, and got ready for our trip home on Saturday.

Mel took us both to the airport, and like a good Taxi Driver, she took the long way (inside joke). Sheila and I parted gates, and I was off. I advised the security officer that I would need the scanner due to my knee implant (it's quicker), only to find that EVERYONE must go thru the scanner. Off I go. I did the "get in the machine, raise your arms above your head, don't move crap, got my scan" and began my exit. They made me stop.

Here came about 5 TSA people, asking me what I had under my shirt. I said nothing, and they said just tell us. I again said nothing, and they showed me the image. There were 8 or so squares that indicated something, but what I didn't know. I swore to them there was nothing under my shirt. Here came the lady pat-down specialist. She also asked me, and I said "only my underwire bra" would show up. She looked at my cloths, no one would touch me. She had me go back in, and they took another scan, but told me to stay in the scanner. They checked out the image, and the lady said.... I bet it's her shirt. The images had changed to different shapes and locations. She had me exit and took me to the side of the scanner (still in full view of everyone) and started my pat down. She told me that she didn't notice the metallic thread in my shirt at first. That is a known problem for scanners, it detects even the slightest thing, even a gum wrapper. It was sort of scary at first, but funny afterwards.

Off I go to my gate. Of course, there were slots next to the gate, and I had time and about $60 dollars to kill, so off I went. I left 30 minutes later, $50 ahead of when I started. There were 3 of us sitting side by side, and each of us won something. We rotated the machines between us, but my flight was called, so I only played 2 of them. It is a great feeling leaving ahead. I know, I know, overall I wasn't, but it was a new day. Got on the plane, and the stewardess started talking to me on our San Antonio stop. She decided I needed a beer. I had already bought one, but she brought me another. Two quick beers in less than 30 minutes. That may be my record.

I haven't talked to Gary or Sheila. Gary had taken Morgan to the lake Saturday, and got home late. He left to take her back early this morning. His daughter Melissa (first marriage) was staying at the lake. So it's just me and Stella.

Here are some pictures Sheila and I took on our Scoot City Tour. We had a blast, to say the least. Sheila refused to drive, even though she almost stomped a hole in the floorboard every time we took a curve. Personally, I think I'm a good driver.