Thursday, December 3, 2009

Update on Tiger

I've had some very positive feedback on my blog item about Tiger. Being the golfer that I am, I must say I was extremely disappointed to find out that the rumors were true. I honestly was hoping that a great athlete, making more money than anyone else in the sports industry, who displays such control and character on the golf course would actually take being married to a beautiful woman with 2 darling kids as something very important. You know....forsaking all others.......Guess Tiger is just like everyone else..... human.

I went to the course today to post the PA schedule, and man tongues were wagging. Steve told me that it was reported that Tiger and Elin are going to a marriage counselor, and re-writing the pre-nup agreement, and that it now will include a 7 digit number. I honestly hope that they can work this thing out.

That being said....... Is it too early for Tiger jokes???

Apparently the police asked Tiger’s wife how many times she hit him. She said “I don’t know exactly, but put me down for a 5.”

Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole-in-one.

What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball?
Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.

What was Elin doing out at 2:30 in the morning?
Clubbing

Why did Tiger crash into a fire hydrant AND a tree?
He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.

Why did Phil Mickelson call Elin yesterday?
To pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.

What is the penalty for getting it in the wrong hole?
Ask Tiger, he knows.

Tiger drives very well on the fairway but doesn’t fare very well on the driveway. Rock me.

What’s the difference between a golf ball and a caddy?
Tiger can drive a golf ball.

Nike wants to drop their endorsement due to accuracy problems. Apparently, Tiger’s spraying his balls everywhere.

It turns out that fixing Tiger’s game and fixing his marriage both require the same thing: better control over his putz.

Why was Tiger’s wife mad at him?
She heard that he played a-round in Australia.

What will the headline be if they prove it is domestic violence?
TIGER’S WIFE MAKES THE CUT

Given Tiger’s racial heritage can we call this a Black Thai affair?

Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family.
Cheetah.

Elin Woods has a twin sister named Josephine. Know how to tell them apart?
Elin is the one holding the bent 3 iron.

First words spoken to the paramedics by Tiger:
Who are you? And what are all these trees doing in my living room?

Tiger Wood’s shirt is all red, problem is, there’s no tournament, and his veins are a pint low.

What does Tiger have in common with a baby seal?
They’ve both been clubbed by a Norwegian.

Okay, that's enough for now. Just couldn't resist the temptation. Hope you all enjoyed today's BLOG. And yes, I know I'm bad.

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